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| Thirteen and counting.. |
| Monday, August 18, 2014 |
Aug 18th marks thirteen years of staying in the US.
This day in 2001 I landed in Chicago all scared and nervous, all alone. I had fought with my mom on the day I left " I am so glad I am leaving this house" I had said. I had NO relative living in the US, only friends of friends or relatives of friends, cannot really take too much advantage. One such friend's sister met me in Chicago and boarded me on the bus to Madison. Severely jetlagged, head spinning, I enjoyed the fast lanes. Everything was so clean! Like looking through a super clean glass, which is what I did, resisting sleep.
My roommate picked me up on campus after the 2.5hr ride around 5PM. I was jetlagged and my roommate already got me upto speed on how she was not getting along with the other roomie, and she wanted me to take her side. Aah right, more headache for the already pounding head.
I had two weeks before school started. A lot of folks had come much earlier, so they told me what needed to be done. The feelings were mixed. First time away from home, happy to be independent, to make my own decisions, nobody to tell me what to do and what not to. Sad to be independant, nobody to tell me what to do what not to do. Double edged sword. $1300 - my first salary per se. I spent a quarter of it every month on phone calls. :--P I have always been bad with finances.
The first two years saw me grow ten years. Doing my own laundry, cooking my own food, washing my own dishes, dealing with people, all on top of studying. At home I only studied,so it was easier. I also realized I wasnt as smart as I thought I was. In my defense, I came to do computer engineering after studying instrumentation engineering. I didnt have the right foundation. The guys in my research group were super smart, some are serial entrepreneurs now, and my low confidence and inferiority complex didnt help.
Second year I moved in with a PhD student, she was so cute. We had the same wavelength even though she was in Chemistry department and had a different life. She introduced me to Friends, wait, TV, yes did not watch TV at all. Only my music and my memories and my thoughts. We cleaned the house together, we did groceries together, we carried the full load og groceries in the bitter cold onto the bus and into the apartment and in and out of lifts. Ah those were the days.
I made an India trip in 2002 and I distinctly remember crying when I got back. The dreaded job search and nightmarish schedules were waiting for me. I used to spend whole nights at the lab until 2-3 and wake up for 8:30AM classes. The pressure would just build slowly as the semester started crank it up and up and up until the month before the end you would be begging for some sleep
I broke someone's heart. I got my heart broken. I somehow managed to study. I was surrounded by people but I was still alone. I got by by talking to DH my then best friend every day. Oh I have to write a whole another blog for that story. Our internet conversations were funny. Come to think of it, I think I wasted quite a bit of time and money :--P when I could have been doing other interesting things. Oh well.
2003-2005 were the most depressing years of my life, dreaded job search, a job I didnt like in a cold cold place I didnt like. I did get my first car, without a real license. A Camry for $7K. I wanted a big car. I had good weekend friends thankfully and my days went by on weekends. I was introduced to loads of board games, which we played late into the night. I did some things that I am terribly ashamed of. I also fell in love. I am not ashamed of that. I was sooo in love, it was an exquisite feeling. So I guess these years were the happiest and crappiest years of my life? Love is what let me survive this tough period.
Came very close to moving back to India. But things turned out well, and decided to spend some more time here, and there has been no looking back since.
New job in 2005, new marriage, new friends, sunny California, things started looking up and things have thankfully stayed the same.
2005-2009 - Long distance marriage had its perks. Weekend husband-wife and weekday bachelor life was super fun. Amazing friends, lot of late nights, board games again, birthday parties, lunch events, did I say lot of friends? Poor DH has travelled and put so many miles in those four years. We travelled so much. We didnt miss a single long weekend. We wanted to visit all the exotic places before we decided to move back to India.
2009-2014 - I finally convinced DH we are not going back to India, we bought a home, we had BSK, we are focussing on our careers. Still working on the social thing. We discovered hiking, running, thanks to AID a little late but better late than never.
Now 2001-2005 is just a bad memory I put at the back of my mind :--P although those were the years I grew up the most. If I were to live those years again. I would be more social, enjoyed life a little more, been more confident, exercised more, dressed better.
But every person has to go through those years to grow and to experience the responsibility that comes with being independent.
To thirteen and more.. |
posted by SK @ 10:18 PM  |
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| 3 Comments: |
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Loved your blog and the memories. Although I think India is the place to be in especially if you grew up there. You missed out on that one :-)
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awesome...loved reading your story.
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Anon,
:--)) as I tell some of my friends, that india I grew up in is very different from what others grew up in ;--)
Shachi, :--))
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Loved your blog and the memories. Although I think India is the place to be in especially if you grew up there. You missed out on that one :-)