| Bikram yoga!
Went for the class this morning. I had bought 10 classes on Groupon more than a month back, just got the chance to use it.
I was not prepared. I didn't take the mat or a towel or water. I had to buy/rent them before the class. I have taken hot power yoga before and expected something similar.
The room was at 104F. Hot hot! We started doing stretches and aasanas. After 45minutes I started feeling nauseous. I hadn't had time to have breakfast, forgot to get a bar and regretted it. I couldn't throw up anything. Slowly I felt dizzy and wanted to be in normal temperature. I headed to the door for some air when something different from usual classes happened. The instructor convinced me to stay inside the room and rest. It felt like torture to me. I felt so weak.
I went back and sat in the Japanese pose and watched. More dizziness and nausea as I tried to do some of the poses. The instructor asked me to drink some water and said I will thank myself for not leaving the room. I cursed her and drank some water and immediately felt better, dizziness gone and got some clarity. But I still felt weak. Last 30minutes were poses with shavasana interspersed which meant I could lie down every few minutes. It was not so bad.
I got out extremely drained of energy. I had to eat something. I wondered why my body was not burning the copious amounts of fat to provide energy.
When I did Insanity for the first time I felt like throwing up. Body has to get used to it. I should have eaten and drank something before class.
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Friday I watched Bride and Prejudice, for some Bollywood masala. I missed listening to Hindi songs. Kumar Sanu and Alka Yagnik won my hearts many times over all the way from Maine Pyar Kiya days. How important it is for women to be independent. How important are books! The reason why I am/was to a certain extent extremely boyish, independent, didn't like girly stuff like jewelry is George from the Famous Five. Otherwise I had no role model per se to fight the norm. My family or any family I knew in my forming high school college days were repressive. Don't go out after dark! Don't show your legs! Don't wear jeans! Don't talk to Annas for a long time without purpose! Etc. I always challenged them.
I noticed just how much Indians spend on weddings ;--P so much stuff. I agree it is a time to celebrate happiness but then after it becomes a way to show off status. My mind set during my wedding was just to get done with the wedding! Didn't care about all the 100 formalities. I like simple processes.
Time are changing, most of my friends' husbands are super nice and share responsibilities. One colleague at work is the bread winner of the house while her husband is a stay at home dad taking care of the kids. I know more such families.
But India still has a long way to go. Some women abuse the so called women empowerment. Incomplete knowledge is dangerous. Once again life in US is so glorified.
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My boss is like Mark Zuckerberg and Steve Jobs. He buys similar clothes so he doesn't have to think too much about what to wear. Too many choices can drain people like me! Making decisions and choices are draining. The book Willpower talks exactly about that. Reading the book I feel like my ego reserves are minimal. I am someone with very little willpower. A lot of work needs to be done in that area if I want to be successful. Uncovering flaw after flaw as I fix myself. The story of my life ;--P
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Had the mother of all headaches today at the birthday party. Most likely because I didn't dry my hair properly after head bath. Times when I cannot trust myself to drive or take care of JSK. Popped an Advil just now and feel better. One more day in the weekend!
So I just might get this other job. Some interviewers seemed very impressed with my background. The past two years I have learnt so much. A lot of soft skills, dealing with people. Supreme multi tasking and prioritizing. Decision making. I am still learning.
I may be leaving some of them behind, move to something totally different. The last time I left verification it felt the same. Leaving programming and technical skills behind! But hey you never really forget. And all the experience helps. I understand exactly what experience means. I still have that debugging mindset that may never leave me that I apply even in my day to day activities. Like the other day when DH had trouble setting up the telescope and I asked the right questions to 'debug' and fix the telescope ;--P I even feel like I may be overqualified for the job ;--P and may lose some time given that I have a good future in the team with more new responsibilities. But it is chaos central! Lot of things are up for grabs. In the new job there will be some ramp time. Will I like it? Not too many night meetings. That one thing is a BIG pro. But I wonder if I am running away from chaoes and if it is a bad thing. Should I take it as a challenge and deal with it?
Detaching myself from this job will be difficult. Have to do it without burning bridges, cos what if I want to come back? Everyone has been super nice to me. I have got the most kudoes and recognitions in this team. More in two years than all eight years combined earlier.
I am getting ahead of myself, look at me!, I don't even have the job in hand and I am dreaming ;--P Pray for me please?? For clarity.
Night!
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